1) When talking to someone, tilt your head to the side.
2) Never laugh at what they say.
3) Laugh at everything they say.
4) Pronunce people's names wrong everytime you meet them.
5) Make a loud and abrupt noise when nobody is looking, then face the other direction when everybody looks your way, pretending the sound came from behind you.
6) Walk around with a plastic sword and shield and tell strangers "I must avenge the death of my father."
7) When in public, pretend you are selling something in an infomercial.
8) Begin every sentence with, "By the Gods!"
9) Tap someone on the shoulder repeatedly.
10)Clear your throat every three or four words while speaking.
11) Walk up to random people and ask them, very seriously, "Do you know the muffin man?"
12) Explain "the little green men" in detail to someone, and when they don't believe you, accuse them of being one in disguise.
13) Call everyone a communist.
14) While going down in an elevator scream, "AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!" for no apparent reason.
15) Convince people you are deaf and talk in an incredibly phony sign language.
16) Go up to a someone and say, "Are you annoyed by irrelevant questions?" And then walk away very quickly.
17) While walking make car noises loudly (Such as changing gears).
18) Also, when riding up an elevator with a stranger, start singing a song that everyone knows, then expect them to start singing too. If they do not start singing, insist, "Everyone knows that song. Are you stupid?"
19) Every time someone asks you to do something or says something to you ask "Is that a threat?"
20) Instead of singing 99 bottles of beer on the wall, sing 999,999,999 bottles of beer on the wall!
21) Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I'm Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!")
22)Dress like a "High-class rich person" and wash windows at random street corners. Demand a dollar in a British accent.
23) At random times in a conversation, say "Hi," "Hello Sir, how are you?" or "Have a good day, thank you."
24) Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.
25) Bark like a dog whenever anyone says the word "the."
26)Try to fit the word "cornucopia" into every sentence you say.
27) Spend an entire weekend pretending you are R2-D2.
28)Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in peoples brains, such as "Feliz Navidad," the Archies' "Sugar," or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
29)Sing the theme to the Batman television show as loudly as you can, over and over and over..
30)Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?", "What?", "Never mind, it's gone now."
Thursday, June 4, 2009
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